Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

I do a big poo
I do it only for you
On my hands is goo

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

billy touched my poo-hole

Toilet Central

Second? Bunk, this is like the tenth "official" one of these dumb things.

Mein Poop or My Struggle

When I poop for the nation
My ass makes a gyration
Then out comes a log or two

When doing this thing
I may blow out an o-ring
But it's something I must do

Then my butt wiper
Puts on a clean diaper
And now I bid you adieu

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

I miss rounders talks.

Our Laws are Toilet Paper

Why America Exists

Our nation's founders
Loved to talk rounders
As they planned our future evolution

And when they wrote all those legal loopholes
They dropped deuces out of their poop holes
Then they called it a Constitution

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

It was a work of art
A most malodorous fart
A toilet bowl champ from the start
Now we bid adieu
To this stinking haiku
Dedicated to my poo

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

I'm your proxy pooper, baby
I'll poop for you for pay
I'm your proxy pooper, baby
C'mon I ain't got all day

So lay your money down
I'll grunt out all that's brown
Just a few more dumps and I'll own this town

I'm your proxy pooper, baby
I'll poop for you for pay

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

The last time I got any was when my finger broke through the toilet paper….

Poop for God and Country

^ Poking your dirty ass with your finger isn't "getting any" you pervert, so learn how to wipe your ass, sicko. Use folds of paper not just a single sheet, duh.

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ved0qqWZPX4

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

(Verse 1)
In the silence, a sound did abound
A toot, a boom, a stinky little sound
It echoed through the room, oh so proud
A gassy little secret, no one dared to avow

(Chorus)
Farts, oh farts, so silent but deadly
A natural act, yet oh so unsteady
Clearing rooms, with a stinky little fame
Farts, oh farts, the laughter's all the same

(Verse 2)
In the elevator, it was a tight squeeze
A tiny little bubble, that brought on the freeze
The awkwardness was palpable, the air was thick
As everyone pretended, it wasn't quite a trick

(Chorus)
Farts, oh farts, so silent but deadly
A natural act, yet oh so unsteady
Clearing rooms, with a stinky little fame
Farts, oh farts, the laughter's all the same

(Bridge)
Who's to blame, for this gassy little crime?
The beans, the broccoli, or the guilty mind?
We giggle and snicker, at the smelly little sound
But deep down, we're all thinking, "That could've been me, spinning around"

(Chorus)
Farts, oh farts, so silent but deadly
A natural act, yet oh so unsteady
Clearing rooms, with a stinky little fame
Farts, oh farts, the laughter's all the same

(Outro)
So let's raise a stink, and let it all out
Embrace the toot, and let the laughter shout
For in the end, it's just a natural part
Of being human, with a gassy little heart

RE: Alien-Earth's 2nd Official Poo Thread!

In the midst of my day, a sudden surprise,
My stomach gave way, to a most mortifying guise.
Caught off guard, I felt the discomfort begin,
A frantic search for a restroom, I hastily spin.

Alas, I was too late, it happened so fast,
A poop, a crap, an embarrassing blast.
I stood there in shock, my cheeks flushed with red,
A poopy pants predicament, I wished I were dead.

But as I looked up, I saw a flash of light,
A silver lining, a beacon of hope in my sight.
A chance to learn, and to grow from this plight,
To find humor in moments, when things don't go right.

For we all make mistakes, and face such a mess,
What's important is learning, and trying our best.
So here's to the poops, the farts, and the sharts,
To the funny, weird, and unpredictable parts.

Twist and Shout

Hi, my name is Lance
I just shit my pants

Hi, my name is Dan
The shit just hit the fan

Hi, my name is Lucy
My stinky farts are juicy